“Is Garner Hall still there?” asks Bob Nanna, frontman and guitarist for the bands Braid and Hey Mercedes.
Sadly, no. In 2012, a year after the website DormSplash labeled it the worst dorm in America, it got the wrecking ball treatment.
But it was not without its moments, says Hanna (’97): “The music room at Garner Hall was where the very first Braid songs were written. We even named a song after it on our first album.”
“Garner Hall Music Room,” the seventh single on “Frankie Welfare Boy Age 5,” goes a little something like this:
Close windows and drapes
To avoid flying glass and
Water damage
***
Close room door and
Evacuate to the nearest
Designated shelter area
***
Do not use the elevator
***
Seek protection from window areas
Do not go outside the building
This is not a test
***
In the event of an emergency
Don’t forget to salvage the scene
A laundry list of spitfire items
And the ring you never wear
***
Hall walls are painted planted
Hall walls never sweat
Hall walls can manage damage
But we never forget
***
Assume seated position in a
Shelter area and await notification
That the danger has passed
***
Hall walls are cornered in corners
Hall walls stay staked
Hall walls can contact coroners
Hall walls don’t break
